Why They’re Talking To You: Alcohol Dependence and Loved Ones

By September 21, 2020 No Comments

Alcohol dependence can lead to difficult questions.

You never used to hear anything about this from anyone. You were just that happy-go-lucky, go-to person when people wanted to have some fun. You had a lot of friends and you have a wonderful family. You’re a lucky person and you know it. So you have a few drinks every now and then. So what, right? Yes, there are times these days when you have a few too many and you miss work or whatever else you had planned for the next day, but that’s just because you got too wrapped up in the moment and you’re getting a bit older. Alcohol hits you harder than it used to. Surely, you’re not falling into the trap of alcohol dependence…

That all sounds good, and you tell yourself these things, but there’s another thought that’s stuck in your craw: People are starting to ask you uncomfortable questions. Your spouse is starting to wonder what’s happening, and those questions are getting more direct and they’re coming at you more often. It’s irritating to hear these things. You’re generally handling your business. Sure, you’ve been drinking quite a bit from time to time, but you’re in control, and you’re sure you can put that bottle down anytime you want.

If you’re in this position, then as much as you may not want to hear it, those questions are something that may require your attention. There are reasons these people are asking them, especially if they didn’t ask them in the past. Swift Recovery Solutions is a team of professionals dedicated to helping those struggling with alcohol dependence. Alcohol abuse is a serious problem. It’s a disease, and it’s a disease that needs treatment. Below are a few reasons why people are talking to you about this, as it may be helpful to try to see things from their perspective.

1.      They Love You – And That Makes You a Lucky Person

The foundational reason that they’re asking you these questions is because they love you. It may be bothersome to have to talk people down with more regularity, but if you’re hearing these things, you need to consider yourself fortunate. If they didn’t truly and deeply care about you, they wouldn’t go through the stress of building up the courage to ask you these questions in the first place. They wouldn’t confront you about your drinking.

2.      They’re Noticing Some Differences

It’s often the case that we notice things in others long before we’d ever see them in ourselves. Have you ever put on 10 pounds for whatever reason? When you look in the mirror, you don’t see that big a difference, but when someone else does the same thing, you’re going to notice. Alcohol dependence often works in the same way. People see that you’re hung over quite often, and they see that you’re often pale, that you often have sunken, bloodshot eyes and that you’re generally listless until you have a few drinks. These are difficult things to see in yourself, and yes, they are signs of alcohol dependence, but in essence people who love you feel that something is wrong more than see it.

3.      They’re Worried You Can’t Stop

The first few times you had too much to drink, your spouse and/or loved ones probably didn’t immediately think that you were suffering from alcohol dependence. Alcohol abuse doesn’t happen overnight. Instead, if anything they may have made an offhand comment or two about how you really let it rip the night before and they were unsure why. However, if those comments become direct questions like, “Are you starting to notice how much you’re drinking?” and the like, it’s because they’ve seen this too many times not to say anything. They don’t feel like they have any other choice but to speak up in hopes that you’ll hear them. What they’re really asking you is if you need help. What they’re also saying is that if you are engaging in alcohol abuse, they are more than willing to provide whatever help they can.

4.      They’ve Likely Seen It Before

Any statistical analysis will tell you that tens of millions of people in the United States suffer from alcohol dependence in one stage or another. That means that it’s more likely than not that your loved ones who are asking you these questions have seen how this plays out in the past. Alcohol abuse, if it goes on without help, can lead to serious physical costs, financial costs and relationship costs. It can destroy lives and families, thereby inflicting serious damage on the family members of someone who is engaging in alcohol abuse. They are worried about what may be coming while you may not be having those thoughts at all.

5.      They Want You To At Least Find Out More

Finally, you should know that when someone you love says, “I’m worried you have a drinking problem,” it doesn’t mean that they’re diagnosing you with alcohol dependence. These people in your life are not clinicians. They are not qualified to observe you and make a definitive diagnosis. They just want to know if what’s happening is something that may require some professional help. They’re not trying to make you feel bad, to belittle you or to put you on the defensive, but rather they want you to get some answers so that you can move forward together with the knowledge of what needs to be done.

Swift Recovery Solutions can provide you with those answers. We can help you figure out if you’re suffering from alcohol dependence or if you just need to work on cutting things down a bit. There are different ways we can provide you with some information. In the more general sense, you can read further on alcohol dependence and other diseases by going to our Members site. Take 10 seconds to log in and then read through our library of information on this and other topics.

You can also contact us at any time to speak to an experienced professional. Just so you’re aware, that conversation will entail us listening as much if not more than us talking. We are not here to judge, and we’re not here to sell you anything. We’re here to help those who need it. If any of this sounds familiar or has gotten you thinking, it’s time to at least found out what’s going on. Give us a call and we’ll take it from there.


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